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Mailman came while you were out
I was sleeping at your house
Letter from your love with an Ottowa address
Filled the shower up with steam
Find out what you mean to him
Before I hand it over
I'll push the flap back down and press
Yes, I'll leave everything the way I found it

I'll bet I'm the best houseguest
Houseguest you ever had
I'll bet I'm the best houseguest
Houseguest you ever had
I never leave my socks around
I always keep the TV down
And when I leave, I never leave a mess

We were resting on the couch
There was nothing much to watch
Other than my manners
And your waning graciousness
I eased your thumb off the remote
Placed my palms against your throats
The heat in here's infernal
And so's that entry in your journal
Yeah, it changed everything the day I found it

I bet I'm the best houseguest
Houseguest you ever had
I bed I'm the best houseguest
To ever crash at your pad
I've done things in your room
You'd be ashamed to accuse me of
It's just a tendency I have when certain people
Refuse me love
Refuse me love
Refuse me love
You refuse
I accuse
Yes, and I leave everything the way I found it

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